We’ve all had moments when a single thought snowballs into something much bigger. A delayed reply to a text, a passing comment at work, or even a look from someone can set off a chain of “what ifs” that leave us feeling anxious, rejected, or stuck. These thought spirals can feel overwhelming, and often they don’t reflect the full picture of what’s really happening.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is a gentle, evidence-based approach that helps break these cycles. By noticing, questioning, and reframing unhelpful thoughts, CBT creates space for more balanced perspectives — and with practice, it can give you tools to manage spirals before they take over.
The impact of a ‘thought spiral’
Let’s look at an example of a ‘thought spiral’. You send a message to a friend, and they don’t reply.
Thought — “They must be ignoring me. Maybe I’ve done something wrong.”
Feeling — You start to feel anxious or rejected.
Behaviour — You avoid messaging them again or withdraw from the friendship.
Over time, this negative thought pattern or spiral reinforces the belief that people don’t want to hear from you — even though the original thought might not have been true.
How CBT breaks the cycle
CBT works on the principle that our thoughts, feelings, and behaviours are linked. When one part of the cycle becomes unhelpful, it can fuel the others. CBT gives you tools to notice the cycle and gently shift it. Some of the strategies include:
Awareness — Recognising that you’re in a thought spiral. Even saying, “I’m spiralling right now” creates a pause and some distance from the thought.
Grounding in action — Using small, practical steps like writing down your thoughts, taking a short walk, or practising a breathing exercise to interrupt the cycle and return to the present.
Challenging unhelpful thoughts — Asking yourself:
- Is this thought based on facts, or assumptions?
- What evidence do I have for and against it?
- Is there another, more balanced way of looking at this?
Reframing — Shifting to a more supportive perspective. For example:
- Unhelpful thought: “They must be ignoring me. I’ve done something wrong.”
- Reframe: “There could be lots of reasons they haven’t replied yet — they might be busy, haven’t seen the message, or are waiting until they have time to respond properly. It doesn’t necessarily mean I’ve done anything wrong.”
How we use CBT in session at ATSC
In sessions, we may use CBT to:
- Notice unhelpful thoughts that may be holding you back
- Gently challenge and reframe those thoughts
- Build new habits and coping strategies that support your goals and wellbeing
CBT is widely used to support people experiencing anxiety, depression, stress, low self-esteem, or trauma. It doesn’t mean ignoring or suppressing your feelings — rather, it’s about creating space to see your thoughts more clearly, so they don’t have so much control over you.
With practice, these strategies can become second nature, making it easier to manage spirals when they happen. Many clients find CBT empowering because it equips you with tools you can carry with you long after therapy.
